How Being A SuperModel, Celebrity Survivor show, And Producer Led To The Self-Esteem Regime – Ep.61 – Clarissa Burt

Episode summary:​ Clarissa Burt has achieved a lot from being a supermodel to being on the game show “Survivor”, and being a producer. She wasn’t born into the spotlight and worked against everything she was taught. 

Coming from a home with abuse and alcohol, they were taught that children are to be seen, not heard. Clarissa sang in the school play in kindergarten and she was hooked. She felt seen and heard on stage. 

From there, she kept getting on stage with plays and even landed a modeling gig in New York. They sent her to do some work in Paris but she was homesick and decided to come home. Quitting modeling, she became a temporary secretary. 

They had sent her to Revlon. Looking at all the modeling photos, she knew she messed up and was willing to do whatever it takes to get back into modeling.

She saved up all her money from this temp job, booked a one-way ticket to Europe, met with an Italian Agent, and before she knew it, her picture was in the hall at Revlon.  

Guest Name & Bio: Clarissa Burt is an internationally acclaimed award-winning media personality, producer, director, writer, author, public speaker and former supermodel and winner of the Celebrity Survivor show!

With hundreds of television and film credits to her name, this Who’s Who of International and American Women brings over 35 years of entertainment industry experience in both International and American markets.

EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION

[Nick McGowan]: Hey Clarissa welcome to the

show how you doing?

[Clarissa Burt]: i’m doing awesome today how about you

[Nick McGowan]: good good know you’re not in your

normal space that you’re in but i appreciate

[Nick McGowan]: your being on on here i was

lookin through your website looking through all the

[Nick McGowan]: stuff that you sent over to me

and i’m really excited to be able to

[Nick McGowan]: get into the conversation at we’re going

to get into because i feel like you’ve

[Nick McGowan]: got a lot of stuff that you’ve

[Clarissa Burt]: uh

[Nick McGowan]: been through and that’s probably just a

simple generality right

[Clarissa Burt]: funny when people say that you know

you have to you’ve got you’ve done so

[Clarissa Burt]: much you got to be old to

do a

[Nick McGowan]: uh

[Clarissa Burt]: you know it always

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: it just kind

[Nick McGowan]: uh

[Clarissa Burt]: of comes back around

[Nick McGowan]: uh

[Clarissa Burt]: know how many how

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: many earth years i’ve got on me

[Nick McGowan]: well you know that’s that’s fine that

you take it there i’m not trying to

[Nick McGowan]: take it

[Clarissa Burt]: as

[Nick McGowan]: there at all it’s funny and to

the audience it’s not like she’s a hundred

[Clarissa Burt]: take

[Nick McGowan]: and

[Clarissa Burt]: so

[Nick McGowan]: forty

[Clarissa Burt]: much

[Nick McGowan]: years old

[Clarissa Burt]: i’ve

[Nick McGowan]: like

[Clarissa Burt]: been around a long

[Nick McGowan]: ye

[Clarissa Burt]: time you know

[Nick McGowan]: yeah i remember when jesus created

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: the planet you know it was an

interesting day we were all you know

[Clarissa Burt]: nob

[Nick McGowan]: having barbecue

[Clarissa Burt]: was

[Nick McGowan]: and

[Clarissa Burt]: on

[Nick McGowan]: wondering

[Clarissa Burt]: noah’s

[Nick McGowan]: what the

[Clarissa Burt]: ark so there

[Nick McGowan]: to she

[Clarissa Burt]: uh

[Nick McGowan]: to and i’m sure we’ll get into

some

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: of that so i don’t want to

take away from getting into that why don’t

[Nick McGowan]: you tell us what do you do

and what’s one thing that most people don’t

[Nick McGowan]: know about you that’s a little odd

or bizarre

[Clarissa Burt]: because i don’t know one of the

things i think a lot of people to

[Clarissa Burt]: know about me is that i want

survivor

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so that was kind of cool being

on

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: the celebrity version of italian survivor

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: ten years ago being on an island

in nikeragua with you know of kids ate

[Clarissa Burt]: a lot younger than me was a

lot of

[Nick McGowan]: so

[Clarissa Burt]: fun you know it was one of

those kinds of why did you do it

[Clarissa Burt]: well because i could you

[Nick McGowan]: a

[Clarissa Burt]: know i’m not married i don’t have

kids i have you know cactus here in

[Clarissa Burt]: phoenix arizona

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so i can get up and leave

any time i want and and i really

[Clarissa Burt]: didn’t want to do it i said

know a hundred times and they talked me

[Clarissa Burt]: into it and i said let’s do

it and it was really it was interesting

[Clarissa Burt]: because what i did learn there when

you’re talking about you leavin the audience with

[Clarissa Burt]: you know some of those you know

kind of like golden nuggets and that is

[Clarissa Burt]: really honestly you can’t trust anybody and

i don’t

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: mean that truly i mean i don’t

say that to like

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: be no just

[Nick McGowan]: right in the beginning of this

[Clarissa Burt]: just be really extra special careful because

you know all the aline you can create

[Clarissa Burt]: all the alliances that you want

[Nick McGowan]: right

[Clarissa Burt]: all your long and all life long

and something so going

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: to happen there’s always there’re always gonna

be triggers are always gonna be differences there’s

[Clarissa Burt]: always gonna be something that somebody’s going

[Nick McGowan]: at

[Clarissa Burt]: to throw at you and and that’s

where you know the real work of the

[Clarissa Burt]: self esteem you know comes nd it’s

how you handle it

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: like that i mean are you still

a

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: class actor do you become a complete

asshole

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so

[Nick McGowan]: yeah which ties into mindset

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: you know how do you handle when

somebody’s braiding you and you go you sucking

[Nick McGowan]: kid me but you can’t you can’t

get back at

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: them in that sort of way

[Clarissa Burt]: exactly

[Nick McGowan]: and now there’s a lot of pieces

that you’ve gone through in that sort of

[Nick McGowan]: sense so why don’t we just dive

straight into it you know there’s there’s some

[Nick McGowan]: of the things that you’ve gone through

specifically self esteem wise

[Clarissa Burt]: hm

[Nick McGowan]: and then i’m sure there are specific

things that you can look back at and

[Nick McGowan]: say my mindset shift helped me or

really hindered me in that spot so let’s

[Nick McGowan]: start with that

[Clarissa Burt]: yes

[Nick McGowan]: were there any key moments or something

that pops up that you’re like right there

[Nick McGowan]: was a pivotal moment where because of

my mindset shift either went down a path

[Nick McGowan]: in a negative way or ativeway

[Clarissa Burt]: you know when i first started modelling

i got into first all had gone to

[Clarissa Burt]: paris first of all i was i

was in new york and i got signed

[Clarissa Burt]: by

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: an agency back in the eighties and

it was great thought that was great and

[Clarissa Burt]: they sent me to paris i didn’t

get along real well paris and i didn’t

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: get along so well i was homesick

i mean i

[Nick McGowan]: my

[Clarissa Burt]: was a kid and i wanted to

go home

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: and i wind up being a secretary

i’m back in new york city

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: you know because i lived in new

jersey at the time back in

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: new york city and i go to

a temporary secretary agency secretarial agency

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: and they send me to rev lan

corporate now you talk

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: about a strange turn of events that

was really the was almost cruel of the

[Clarissa Burt]: universe to sent

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: me here i’m like

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: i’m

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: sitting read hard and i’m looking around

walls and all of these super models with

[Clarissa Burt]: you know the beautiful make up

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: and damn it i really screwed paris

up i was there for like ten months

[Clarissa Burt]: i just couldn’t i just didn’t it

wasn’t my vie i just couldn’t do paris

[Clarissa Burt]: for some reason

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: back in the day um and so

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: anyway i’m looking at these walls i’m

gonna really screw this up make myself enough

[Clarissa Burt]: money from that job to buy another

[Nick McGowan]: what

[Clarissa Burt]: one way ticket back to europe and

i had you know

[Nick McGowan]: nice

[Clarissa Burt]: a few years had passed now i

wasn’t you know i was like twenty one

[Clarissa Burt]: now and

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and i go back up the willin

and they had the italian agent like the

[Clarissa Burt]: italian agent he says

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: and then you want the ukon

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: co it so i did i went

to milan

[Nick McGowan]: yes

[Clarissa Burt]: and that’s where it really started for

me and within

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: two years my picture was on the

walls at revlan

[Nick McGowan]: whoa

[Clarissa Burt]: so this is one

[Nick McGowan]: wow

[Clarissa Burt]: of those kind of moments when you

go okay hold on hold up

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: hold on there sparkles as they say

you know

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: don’t ever ever ever ever think that

your first chance was your last chance you

[Clarissa Burt]: know don’t ever think that this is

something that if it happens once you know

[Clarissa Burt]: you screwed it up

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: fix it you know what we’re all

going to make mistake you know i like

[Clarissa Burt]: to talk about you fail being your

first attempt in learning right and i was

[Clarissa Burt]: learning

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: a whole bunch back there i still

learned i’m sixty three and i’m still learning

[Clarissa Burt]: a bunch of stuff every day but

back then you know there was there was

[Clarissa Burt]: a bunch of

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: learn curves that were going on and

i didn’t have there wasn’t a lot of

[Clarissa Burt]: support around me so i just went

ahead and did all the mistakes that i

[Clarissa Burt]: could and then you know for wherever

[Nick McGowan]: knock

[Clarissa Burt]: i

[Nick McGowan]: them

[Clarissa Burt]: could

[Nick McGowan]: all out

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: so why don’t you give us a

little bit more context for the audience because

[Nick McGowan]: i think we just jump straight into

the model now super model so the audience

[Nick McGowan]: might be and you’re saying who am

i talking to because now we’re pictures on

[Nick McGowan]: the wall so rev lan so

[Clarissa Burt]: okay

[Nick McGowan]: how did we get here

[Clarissa Burt]: little christie bert out of philadelphia pensylvania

from a regular you know middle class family

[Clarissa Burt]: row home in collingdale and philadelphia

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: and you know

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: the background that needle tribe was a

little they were brutal it was a little

[Clarissa Burt]: tough at home so we had mom

[Nick McGowan]: delcais not for everyone

[Clarissa Burt]: twelve years to the nuns dad twelve

years to the

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: priests know a lot of

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: children are supposed

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: to be seen and not heard and

a lot of violence in the house there

[Clarissa Burt]: was now

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: there was drinking and violence and that’s

where i started to learn that you know

[Clarissa Burt]: we were kansas anymore

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so there were going to be some

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: very difficult times and roads i came

out of that house with p t s

[Clarissa Burt]: d for sure for sure

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: so there were a lot of things

that i had to learn about love and

[Clarissa Burt]: life and relationships and trust and

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: right and wrong so that’s where it

all started that’s i was and i was

[Clarissa Burt]: mary poppins in the kinder garden play

i think we’ll throw that in there also

[Clarissa Burt]: because what

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: really wasn’t what i really

[Nick McGowan]: okay

[Clarissa Burt]: found that gave me if you will

some solace and it was it was the

[Clarissa Burt]: recognition from being

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: on stage i mean when i heard

after i got done singing super calaprogelistic x

[Clarissa Burt]: dosia and i heard my first applause

i was hooked that was it

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s all i needed so i have

been living basically almost all of my life

[Clarissa Burt]: on stage and in front of a

microphone it started out with modeling but then

[Clarissa Burt]: you know well being many different things

but it’s been you know these were the

[Clarissa Burt]: beginnings you know this again the day

ill tribe that where you’re first you’re first

[Clarissa Burt]: formed and that’s

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: a lot of that you take with

you for the rest of your life unless

[Clarissa Burt]: you really fall in love with personal

development you fall in love with self

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: help you fall in love with wanting

to get the i call it self help

[Clarissa Burt]: it ain’t shelf

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: help right it’s

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: not supposed

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: to be sitting on the shelf you’re

not supposed to bring it home and not

[Clarissa Burt]: read it it’s you know it takes

the courage that it takes to you to

[Clarissa Burt]: want to go down

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: that path and

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: and that’s where it all started for

me yeah

[Nick McGowan]: you and i both know that that’s

not something where the personal development stuff doesn’t

[Nick McGowan]: just pop up one day where you’re

like oh shit i should go read this

[Nick McGowan]: book by

[Clarissa Burt]: ye

[Nick McGowan]: zig zigler or i should go do

this thing or what have you it’s typical

[Nick McGowan]: always somebody that has opened the door

for you in some sort of situation that

[Nick McGowan]: opened door for you i i grew

up in glen old and in prospect park

[Nick McGowan]: we didn’t we didn’t know that as

we got into

[Clarissa Burt]: grand

[Nick McGowan]: this but

[Clarissa Burt]: parents

[Nick McGowan]: now you do

[Clarissa Burt]: lived in glen olden

[Nick McGowan]: yeah funny you know it’s

[Clarissa Burt]: my

[Nick McGowan]: interesting how del co

[Clarissa Burt]: as

[Nick McGowan]: there’s there’s a stigma about del co

and how we just are very hard working

[Nick McGowan]: people

[Clarissa Burt]: yes

[Nick McGowan]: but for the most part what i

experienced was a if it was just put

[Nick McGowan]: fucking dirt on it stand up get

up get back to

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s

[Nick McGowan]: work

[Clarissa Burt]: right

[Nick McGowan]: put dirt on it and get back

up on so i know that that’s not

[Nick McGowan]: typically one of those easy shifts to

go you know what let’s re think this

[Nick McGowan]: let’s look at the way we’re doing

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: things that’s not typically the mo and

it doesn’t sound like it was how you

[Nick McGowan]: were raised at all so tell us

a bit about how you got into that

[Nick McGowan]: because i know that’s a transformative uhtransformational

phase of life that really prepells you into

[Nick McGowan]: something where you’re at now

[Clarissa Burt]: well you know you know again the

formation being children would be seen and not

[Clarissa Burt]: heard

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: wait a minute children are supposed to

be set and not heard and i made

[Clarissa Burt]: my life basically on stage and in

front of a microphone

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: my

[Nick McGowan]: being

[Clarissa Burt]: mother

[Nick McGowan]: seen unheard

[Clarissa Burt]: my mother who absolutely just couldn’t take

a picture of the woman she hated taking

[Clarissa Burt]: her picture taken and she oh my

god she stayed away from the camera her

[Clarissa Burt]: entire

[Nick McGowan]: huh

[Clarissa Burt]: life what did i do i went

and i worked in front of the camera

[Clarissa Burt]: my father now you might remember this

from back in the day we were irish

[Clarissa Burt]: right so you know there were lots

of you know and god forgive me i

[Clarissa Burt]: don’t mean to say but back in

the day there were a lot of dagos

[Clarissa Burt]: and a lot of wops that and

get along with the irish advice

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: versa right

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so what did i do i moved

to italy so i moved to italy

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: work in front of a camera right

and and and so i already

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: in my own very special way without

being angry with anyone or anyone being angry

[Clarissa Burt]: with me completely

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: turned the tables on what it was

that had learned a lot of the other

[Clarissa Burt]: things i had learned good manners and

and

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: those are the things that served me

but what didn’t serve me was don’t take

[Clarissa Burt]: my picture and the races at all

that i never served i don’t think it

[Clarissa Burt]: serves anybody’s

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so yeah you

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: have to be able to know again

when they try they’ll give you what they

[Clarissa Burt]: got you’re always going to go for

christmas dinner an you’re going to love them

[Clarissa Burt]: all ways but not everything they teach

you is going to serve you so and

[Clarissa Burt]: i can

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: see same thing for your faith i

can say the same thing for the educative

[Clarissa Burt]: process you know the friends you make

in college

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and university i can say the same

thing for the books that you read the

[Clarissa Burt]: people you hang out with and they

have transit and through the years right you’re

[Clarissa Burt]: not hanging out the same people

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: that you did ten years ago or

twenty years ago because you’re

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: a different person because your path has

has has taken on your path is probably

[Clarissa Burt]: more about your truth now and what

works for you doesn’t

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and if it isn’t yet if you’re

still

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: figuring that all out then you know

get into the personal development section

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: it warns a noble when i

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: was a kid we had wall so

we had boarded books and we had borne

[Clarissa Burt]: noble and there was like

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: one bin that was about self help

right and i lived i lived there now

[Clarissa Burt]: as a billion dollar industry you know

personal development i mean you’re gonna want

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: ward a noble now is like isles

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: and isles and isles that never end

of of self help and personal development my

[Clarissa Burt]: crowning glory if you don’t mind if

i a little ragbeise you know i’m in

[Clarissa Burt]: born a noble now with the self

esteem regime and my last name being bert

[Clarissa Burt]: i’m like right next to tania brown

berne brown these are girls that

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: opera i’m right

[Nick McGowan]: nice

[Clarissa Burt]: next to pock opera and dr joe

dispenser so you can imagine that for me

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: to be like you know on the

shelf with the titans of the personal development

[Clarissa Burt]: industry

[Nick McGowan]: sue

[Clarissa Burt]: it’s come full circle for me let’s

just put it that way

[Nick McGowan]: i bet it’s kind of humbling at

times to think i can even see i

[Nick McGowan]: can see in your face now where

it’s still like

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: that’s real but it’s not something like

if you do life right you shouldn’t be

[Nick McGowan]: able to script it

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: you shouldn’t be able to

[Clarissa Burt]: exactly

[Nick McGowan]: you can think of these things and

you can say i want all this stuff

[Nick McGowan]: but if you do it right and

you actually put the energy out there

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: bigger things are going to happen crazier

things

[Clarissa Burt]: no doubt

[Nick McGowan]: so i love that for you i

mean i get fckingchills just even thinking about

[Nick McGowan]: that

[Clarissa Burt]: thank

[Nick McGowan]: ship

[Clarissa Burt]: you very much

[Nick McGowan]: that’s so awesome

[Clarissa Burt]: so

[Nick McGowan]: you also you talked about not trusting

people and i want to get back to

[Nick McGowan]: that because what i’m understanding from what

you’re saying it’s not a matter not trusting

[Nick McGowan]: but it’s a matter of not just

taking things at face value and just saying

[Nick McGowan]: well this is kind of the gospel

and that’s how i’m going to run with

[Nick McGowan]: it

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: and doing what you want with it

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: like what you’re doing to be able

to say well we got a thing against

[Nick McGowan]: italians hero i’m going to go to

italy and i’m going to go and sing

[Nick McGowan]: and

[Clarissa Burt]: yes

[Nick McGowan]: talk to people and be in front

of people all the anti things you don’t

[Clarissa Burt]: kay

[Nick McGowan]: want me to do

[Clarissa Burt]: oh no

[Nick McGowan]: so it’s interesting how you put that

together looking back at that now thinking about

[Nick McGowan]: how you don’t trust people or take

things at a face value how do you

[Nick McGowan]: how do you kind of walk through

life thinking about that and exploring new adventures

[Clarissa Burt]: because i understand now i understand i

think i’m rather empathic as well i

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: really want

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: you know when i was a kid

when i was a kid in school i

[Clarissa Burt]: didn’t really like going out to recess

i was never really the joiner i tried

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: that click stuff it just wasn’t my

gig and so i would go out if

[Clarissa Burt]: i was out in the playground i

would be with the under dog the one

[Clarissa Burt]: kid that nobody wanted to have anything

to do with making fun of it and

[Clarissa Burt]: didn’t want to play with right after

that i started to go up to the

[Clarissa Burt]: kinnegarden classes and i was like second

third fourth grade and here i’m like trotting

[Clarissa Burt]: up

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: because because i found i found my

importance if you will in helping every the

[Clarissa Burt]: kids helping the teacher mark papers

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: helping the kids by reading to them

like whatever it was i only had forty

[Clarissa Burt]: five minutes for recess but that’s how

i spent my time you know and so

[Clarissa Burt]: the idea that i think it was

about taking the high road and i just

[Clarissa Burt]: created me

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: a little acronymand little acrnym and it’s

it’s honesty

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: integrity its greatness and honor and i

know i sound like you know i’m not

[Clarissa Burt]: a military bread i’m just saying those

four for me are values that if we

[Clarissa Burt]: could

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: all bring to the table like practice

go honesty honesty with yourself honesty

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: with everybody else oh my god kind

of world would this be can you imagine

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: what would be bringing to the table

um

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: integrity

[Nick McGowan]: man

[Clarissa Burt]: your moral principles your

[Nick McGowan]: mhm

[Clarissa Burt]: values like biggest word in my vocabulary

is integrity greatness and you can change that

[Clarissa Burt]: with gratitude if you want you wanted

to be gratitude that’s great we take the

[Clarissa Burt]: two gs here and we don’t discriminate

and then it’s honor you know like who

[Clarissa Burt]: are you when nobody else is in

the room i got to tell

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: you a story you love the story

i’m gonna tell you this story so i’m

[Clarissa Burt]: doing i’m doing survivor and and i

was already older i’m like fifty three already

[Clarissa Burt]: and you know like and i’m like

i’m like i didn’t want to even do

[Clarissa Burt]: the show so i’m like so in

the background my mother and my sister didn’t

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: think i was on the show for

the first couple weeks a couple of weeks

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: we had you know the pretty the

pretty girls and the bikinis you now the

[Clarissa Burt]: younger chicks were out and in the

four right

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so we have to do this one

exercise one day when we have to get

[Clarissa Burt]: on that hello copter

[Nick McGowan]: okay

[Clarissa Burt]: and so here we are at the

hellapad and the girls get the guy that’s

[Clarissa Burt]: you know the pilot of the helicopter

and they go can you go into the

[Clarissa Burt]: little you know hut over there and

buy us something to eat because we’re in

[Clarissa Burt]: nicaragua and he goes and he comes

back with this paper bag full of stuff

[Clarissa Burt]: to

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: eat so i’m in the front the

two girls are in the back and they’re

[Clarissa Burt]: like oh thank you thank you they’re

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: doing and i get it’s cool it’s

fine and

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: they’re doing the whole thing and i’m

in the front and i get this tap

[Clarissa Burt]: on my shoulder and i turn around

and they’re handing me some of the food

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: i want

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: oh no thanks thanks thanks no thanks

no i hadn’t eaten in weeks i had

[Clarissa Burt]: literally lost twenty pounds on this island

that while

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: i was there but there were rules

to the game

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: and it was honesty

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: and dishonesty

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: what was the right thing to do

and what is the right thing to do

[Clarissa Burt]: i mean i was hungry and nobody

would have ever known the three

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: of us i would have known

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: they would have known so when

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: i said no thank you it immediately

it immediately there was this like divide because

[Nick McGowan]: h

[Clarissa Burt]: remember the game is

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: all about winning right it tell tell

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: talent you know telling

[Nick McGowan]: cool

[Clarissa Burt]: on everybody not telling on anybody you

can do whatever you want

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: i don’t agree but they looked at

me differently because they were like oh my

[Clarissa Burt]: god she’s going to say something she’s

go telling us

[Nick McGowan]: she

[Clarissa Burt]: we’re going

[Nick McGowan]: knows

[Clarissa Burt]: to be a big trouble

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: or who

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: the hell she think she is now

like there was there was a couple of

[Clarissa Burt]: different ways that this whole thing gone

down

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: and i still to this day i

can look at myself in the mirror and

[Clarissa Burt]: know that i always i always at

least try in perfect am i but i

[Clarissa Burt]: always try to take

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: the high road

[Nick McGowan]: it’s huge and what a test in

that moment i mean it’s probably easier to

[Nick McGowan]: be able to talk about it now

because you’re not in that temptation moment

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: but in that moment you’re like it’s

been a while like

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: oh my god i could but imagine

[Clarissa Burt]: it’s awesome

[Nick McGowan]: um

[Clarissa Burt]: it was awesome though it was great

it was a great moment as a great

[Clarissa Burt]: testament

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: to to me for myself you know

[Nick McGowan]: sure

[Clarissa Burt]: sometimes you have to really know we

have our akalasond our successes and we’re doing

[Clarissa Burt]: good

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: but

[Nick McGowan]: i

[Clarissa Burt]: when is it that you really ever

prove your true self to your

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: true self

[Nick McGowan]: or at least show your true self

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: to yourself

[Clarissa Burt]: yes

[Nick McGowan]: so throughout that time what did you

learn managing your mindset through that and i

[Nick McGowan]: can almost guarantee it shaped you in

some sort of way so how did it

[Nick McGowan]: shape you yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: you know i think in that instance

it was i was extremely proud

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: i knew that you know

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: it’s always easy to lie it’s always

easier to take the easy way out just

[Clarissa Burt]: an easier thing

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: do it’s not necessarily the honest thing

to do it’s not the thing that you

[Clarissa Burt]: know it’s not full of integrity when

you take the easy way out it’s

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: not a way of living in greatness

and certainly it has nothing do with honor

[Clarissa Burt]: i like being i like being thought

of as a woman of honor and i

[Clarissa Burt]: think

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: if more people were coming to the

table with

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: really strong values and living by

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: them you know ike swearing

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: m like i will like i’m drawing

a line in the cement i’m not drawing

[Clarissa Burt]: a line

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: sand you know what i mean it’s

a whole different

[Nick McGowan]: totally

[Clarissa Burt]: mind set the whole gig is like

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: you know you get up in the

morning your inspiration and your motivation and your

[Clarissa Burt]: working out you’re doing all the things

you’ve your affirm affirmations are great book is

[Clarissa Burt]: full of informations but one you can

really live by the values those true values

[Clarissa Burt]: that you set for yourself you’re bringing

a better to you and you’re bringing a

[Clarissa Burt]: better to everyone else

[Nick McGowan]: time yeah it’s a principle centered life

that’s

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: what it’s about

[Clarissa Burt]: col

[Nick McGowan]: and i think it breaks out in

a couple different pieces to that recipe though

[Nick McGowan]: where people need to understand that there

are the principles then they need to understand

[Nick McGowan]: what their own principles are and then

how to use them and it’s not one

[Nick McGowan]: of those things like you had mentioned

edication it’s not something that talked about in

[Nick McGowan]: schools at least it wasn’t in

[Clarissa Burt]: no

[Nick McGowan]: del co

[Clarissa Burt]: ah exactly

[Nick McGowan]: your generation mind they didn’t talk about

that stuff

[Clarissa Burt]: so

[Nick McGowan]: or teach

[Clarissa Burt]: for

[Nick McGowan]: you how to learn or to look

through the fallacies and the bullshit through it

[Nick McGowan]: so

[Clarissa Burt]: what

[Nick McGowan]: where do you think you got that

was that something that was innate inside of

[Nick McGowan]: you or

[Clarissa Burt]: understood

[Nick McGowan]: that come from

[Clarissa Burt]: well i think i understood from early

early age that it really hurts when

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: somebody is lying cheating and stealing

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: from you or

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: cheating on you are lying to you

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: or or defaming you in any way

the fame facing

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: defaming whatever the word proper word is

it just hurts you know it really

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: hurts it’s not stand up and you

know it hurts you to the core so

[Clarissa Burt]: i think from the obviously the greatest

things some of the greatest things in life

[Clarissa Burt]: have grown from an immense amount of

pain and you have

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: to understand you can take pain in

two different directions you know you can take

[Clarissa Burt]: it right or left you can it

right or wrong there’s there’s really no other

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: way around it and i understood it

from early early and i think also what

[Clarissa Burt]: loyalty is and you know loyalty is

when you have somebody’s back behind their back

[Clarissa Burt]: Nick

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and that’s a huge one loyalty is

right up there with you now honesty in

[Clarissa Burt]: tech the greatness and honor loyalty is

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: if you can stay at the cool

you know the water cooler and just jump

[Clarissa Burt]: in on the tribe mentality and you

know be trash in susie q okay but

[Clarissa Burt]: can you stand there and say you

know

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: what guys i know susy and i

don’t know i think she’s kind of great

[Clarissa Burt]: so maybe she was just having a

bad day that day like advocate for someone

[Clarissa Burt]: else

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: maybe she was just having a bad

day they or you know like have we

[Clarissa Burt]: walked a mile in susaqusshoes have you

done that because until you do that you

[Clarissa Burt]: can’t

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: you can’t really so you know the

whole loyalty piece when when you do that

[Clarissa Burt]: again you’re setting yourself apart from the

tribe so remember that the longest mile Nick

[Clarissa Burt]: is always sorry the longest mile is

always also the most lonely mile

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: can be the most

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: trash a smile but it’s definitely most

[Nick McGowan]: h

[Clarissa Burt]: lonely

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so if you want a lot of

times you know in order to be in

[Clarissa Burt]: leadership roles and to have a really

really strong positive mind set it can be

[Clarissa Burt]: a little lonely

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: little lonely

[Nick McGowan]: absolutely i’m glad you bring

[Clarissa Burt]: are

[Nick McGowan]: that

[Clarissa Burt]: you ready

[Nick McGowan]: up

[Clarissa Burt]: for that are you ready for that

[Nick McGowan]: yeah i’m glad you bring that up

because i feel like our audience experiences that

[Nick McGowan]: at times which at certain times will

also wash an impostor syndrome where

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: you go ship should i be here

i supposed to be

[Clarissa Burt]: i suppose ye

[Nick McGowan]: and i think for the most part

everybody i’ve talked to it’s like if you

[Nick McGowan]: really get to the core of it

they’re like we all don’t know what the

[Nick McGowan]: fuck is going on right now

[Clarissa Burt]: well you

[Nick McGowan]: we’re

[Clarissa Burt]: need

[Nick McGowan]: just

[Clarissa Burt]: her

[Nick McGowan]: trying to do the best we can

yeah and it’s a matter of

[Clarissa Burt]: yes

[Nick McGowan]: stemming from those principles because when you’re

in those different moments like we can talk

[Nick McGowan]: a great game about things but it’s

[Clarissa Burt]: as

[Nick McGowan]: not until you’re in the moment where

you act we have to show up and

[Nick McGowan]: you have to be integriss or you

have to have honor you have to do

[Nick McGowan]: that so if we’re to take a

little bit of a step back and you

[Nick McGowan]: could see that somebody is right about

to walk into that what sort of advice

[Nick McGowan]: would you tell them as

[Clarissa Burt]: ma

[Nick McGowan]: they’re about

[Clarissa Burt]: your

[Nick McGowan]: to

[Clarissa Burt]: emotional

[Nick McGowan]: walk into that

[Clarissa Burt]: intelligence manage

[Nick McGowan]: awesome

[Clarissa Burt]: your into into emotional intelligence

[Nick McGowan]: okay

[Clarissa Burt]: because the impostor styndrum is nothing more

than i’m doing good and i just don’t

[Clarissa Burt]: feel like i’m good enough to tell

myself i am because

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: many other people might might

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: give the accolade and the compliments and

the pats on the back and you still

[Clarissa Burt]: notwithstanding you’re gonna you know you want

to crap l over yourself and saying you

[Clarissa Burt]: know i don’t i just don’t you

see what they see what do they see

[Clarissa Burt]: that i don’t see because it doesn’t

feel that way to me so when you’re

[Clarissa Burt]: managing your your

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: emotional intelligence to your tour bill

[Nick McGowan]: okay

[Clarissa Burt]: to interpret and understand your emotions and

the sensations in your body it’s also i

[Clarissa Burt]: don’t know i just think it’s just

it’s so damn important also because you

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: learn your triggers what does trigger

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: you and then

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: it’s like self awareness self

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: regulation and you have to be able

to you love yourself enough and that’s where

[Clarissa Burt]: the self esteem principles come in you

know

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: four pillars that look good feel good

be good and greater good and when you’re

[Clarissa Burt]: look when you’re looking good we all

know that’s you know like self esteem one

[Clarissa Burt]: a one but you know you get

a little

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: lilt in yours when you know you

you know you’re you know you’re looking

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: pretty good you know the fits nice

you’re looking you’re looking good look ud feel

[Clarissa Burt]: good feel good diet exercise nutrition at

all we’re in brain health now exactly know

[Clarissa Burt]: how it all

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: works together and you’re taking care be

good more you on with your relationship is

[Clarissa Burt]: how you doing with leadership how you’re

doing with finances and everything else that is

[Clarissa Burt]: going on around in your life and

then we have the greater good and that

[Clarissa Burt]: is where you tie though you pay

forward pay it back o volunteer

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: do something good for somebody else so

when you’re doing all that stuff there’s just

[Clarissa Burt]: no way you can’t be feeling good

about yourself like

[Nick McGowan]: for real

[Clarissa Burt]: to really

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: give yourself give you something to love

yourself first and you know we use mirror

[Clarissa Burt]: therapy in the book and i didn’t

create it i learned the work from louise

[Clarissa Burt]: hays and even jack canfield had it

in some of his works when you’re get

[Clarissa Burt]: in front of him and you start

getting in your own face and you start

[Clarissa Burt]: saying hey listen just want to tell

you i think you’re pretty damn amazing and

[Clarissa Burt]: love you and i do forgive you

too at one time that you did or

[Clarissa Burt]: you said what eve were

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: that other i forgive you too

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so i forgive you i love you

you’re amazing see you next time i mean

[Clarissa Burt]: you’re looking right into your own eyes

you’re digging down into your own

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: you into your own soul don’t wait

for they call it self esteem for a

[Clarissa Burt]: reason because you’re not supposed to be

waiting for everybody else

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: to be filling your

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: self esteem it’s your work it’s yourself

you’re supposed to be working on forget what

[Clarissa Burt]: everybody else it’s none of your business

what everybody else thinks about you’ve heard this

[Clarissa Burt]: a million times

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: your business where everybody else thinks about

you your business though to know what you

[Clarissa Burt]: think about you so i tone

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: down really good on all the emotional

intelligence pieces yeah

[Nick McGowan]: that’s a great point and i think

to add on what you were just saying

[Nick McGowan]: about looking at yourself at that point

a lot of people will just pop on

[Nick McGowan]: to social media and it’s difficult to

be able to look at yourself when you’re

[Nick McGowan]: looking at other people

[Clarissa Burt]: what

[Nick McGowan]: share what seems like magical moments in

their life and you’re just thumbing through and

[Nick McGowan]: thumbing through and thumbing through almost like

at times we an make it so much

[Nick McGowan]: difficult

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: so much more difficult for ourselves

[Clarissa Burt]: s

[Nick McGowan]: instead of just being able to kind

of pull out from that so i’m glad

[Nick McGowan]: that you bring up being able to

talk to yourself in the mirror i’ve talked

[Nick McGowan]: to different clients about that friends even

where they’re like i don’t i don’t want

[Nick McGowan]: to do that i’m like you an

try it

[Clarissa Burt]: try

[Nick McGowan]: try it

[Clarissa Burt]: just

[Nick McGowan]: and

[Clarissa Burt]: do

[Nick McGowan]: then

[Clarissa Burt]: this

[Nick McGowan]: back to me and tell

[Clarissa Burt]: one

[Nick McGowan]: me what you think

[Clarissa Burt]: do a minute

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: you know you have to

[Nick McGowan]: i’ve

[Clarissa Burt]: like it

[Nick McGowan]: never had anybody come back and be

like yo i was complete more on

[Clarissa Burt]: so

[Nick McGowan]: because even if they were they were

like but i love me and i talked

[Nick McGowan]: through things and here i am stay

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: and in my bathroom my wife’s like

what are you doing so it’s always interesting

[Nick McGowan]: how that stuff works but it takes

us actually doing that work so what does

[Nick McGowan]: your daily work look like as you

do your deep work

[Clarissa Burt]: my deeper work is you know meditation

little meditation in the morning definitely i try

[Clarissa Burt]: to get at least a thirty minute

work out in the morning you know when

[Clarissa Burt]: i can sometimes

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: i’m really too slam because i start

working with europe first the morning as well

[Nick McGowan]: got it

[Clarissa Burt]: because i got a lot of that

going on so depending on what that day

[Clarissa Burt]: looks like i will try to get

that thirty minutes and definitely the water all

[Clarissa Burt]: the healthy stuff you know all that

making sure that all happens and then i

[Clarissa Burt]: allow myself i have a little bit

of young food every once in a while

[Clarissa Burt]: because perfect i am not but and

then i have found recently especially in different

[Clarissa Burt]: case scenarios especially with work where people

have gone behind the bat you know people

[Clarissa Burt]: people or people and you know you

just got to love them where they’re at

[Clarissa Burt]: and

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: so and i didn’t always

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: do that you know i was i

was zero to sixty and two seconds like

[Clarissa Burt]: i got you know i could get

my irish up just like as quickly as

[Clarissa Burt]: anybody else you know you get your

irish up let me

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: get your gander up and means goes

you go zero to sixty and you tell

[Clarissa Burt]: somebody exactly what you think

[Nick McGowan]: especially

[Clarissa Burt]: about

[Nick McGowan]: from del co

[Clarissa Burt]: don’t do that anyway we don’t do

[Nick McGowan]: uh

[Clarissa Burt]: that i don’t do that any more

so i stop

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: stop i drop i think now

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: i think

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: it through

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: and i come from again i go

back up to taking the high road again

[Clarissa Burt]: living in honor

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and honesty and integrity and how would

i want to be treated as well because

[Clarissa Burt]: people are you know people are faulty

we are all faulty and we are going

[Clarissa Burt]: to make mistakes

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: i talk about oundaries and when i

talk about boundaries people think oh my god

[Clarissa Burt]: you got to get upset and pissed

off and let everybody know no you can

[Clarissa Burt]: do with esejinglorie and let everybody know

how it is and you will and will

[Clarissa Burt]: not be treated that’s kind of the

gig

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: right there right so um you know

that is really important also for me it

[Clarissa Burt]: was like well how do i want

to be treated if somebody was yelling and

[Clarissa Burt]: screaming at me that doesn’t feel so

good

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: i remember it’s not cool and

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so i had to completely that’s what

i learned i learned that anger was the

[Clarissa Burt]: way to get everything across an i

had to unlearn that you know my first

[Clarissa Burt]: chapter

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: my first chapter in here is release

what do you need to unlearn

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: so i had to unlearn all that

stuff in order to chapter two rebuild

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so i mean it’s pretty it’s a

reconstruction it’s just reconstruct and reconstruct simple as

[Clarissa Burt]: that

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: and sometimes you have to do that

on the daily and sometimes you might have

[Clarissa Burt]: to do it on the hourly you

know people

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: say to me i just read the

book why do i have because i have

[Clarissa Burt]: a master mind i’ve read the book

already we have to read it again i

[Clarissa Burt]: don’t know do you think you have

anything you need to release in the last

[Clarissa Burt]: year

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: since you read it last

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: you know or do you have to

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: kind of rebuild anything at all in

the last year since you read it last

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: so yeah yes

[Nick McGowan]: it’s huge i always appreciate hearing more

depth of the story that led to a

[Nick McGowan]: book because we as audience and listeners

and readers only get the actual tangible book

[Nick McGowan]: the actual digital copy of it

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: but not the actual story that led

through each and every chapter

[Clarissa Burt]: well

[Nick McGowan]: so what

[Clarissa Burt]: we

[Nick McGowan]: did

[Clarissa Burt]: allow

[Nick McGowan]: you learn

[Clarissa Burt]: me to

[Nick McGowan]: as you

[Clarissa Burt]: read

[Nick McGowan]: went

[Clarissa Burt]: something

[Nick McGowan]: through it

[Clarissa Burt]: just real quick we allow me to

read something

[Nick McGowan]: sure

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s really quick so it comes from

the acknowledgments i want to acknowledge the millions

[Clarissa Burt]: of people who all over the world

have been abandoned abused beaten struck oppressed depressed

[Clarissa Burt]: distressed held back lied to cheated on

lost betrayed deceived misled double crossed walked out

[Clarissa Burt]: on

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: stabbed in the back sold down the

river stolen from deserted discarded shunned cast out

[Clarissa Burt]: dropped dumped forgotten neglected rejected end or

dejected do you think anybody on the planet

[Clarissa Burt]: that this isn’t a good pot for

[Nick McGowan]: i’m pretty sure he covered everybody

[Clarissa Burt]: s right

[Nick McGowan]: living dead

[Clarissa Burt]: everybody you know

[Nick McGowan]: all of them

[Clarissa Burt]: so again you know some of us

came from phenomenal background and greatest

[Nick McGowan]: sure

[Clarissa Burt]: parents on the planet and some of

us were completely abandoned and left for you

[Clarissa Burt]: know so everyone has their story and

you the most beautiful thing but i think

[Clarissa Burt]: about all of this is that you

get you know you get to be you

[Clarissa Burt]: like how damn lucky

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: are you

[Nick McGowan]: hm

[Clarissa Burt]: get to you you know you’re hired

source universe you know you’re hired whatever you

[Clarissa Burt]: believe in that they knew exactly what

they were doing they created you you have

[Clarissa Burt]: no right at all to be second

guests and what they did so just get

[Clarissa Burt]: on with it

[Nick McGowan]: how

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s

[Nick McGowan]: dare you

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s yeah exactly

[Nick McGowan]: uh

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s why i call it a regime

because

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: the reime is an organized way of

doing things just

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: do the damn work you put your

big up boy riches on you put your

[Clarissa Burt]: big girl bridges on and do the

work it’s going to be scary be scary

[Clarissa Burt]: and it’s going to take some courage

lots of courage you know what so what

[Clarissa Burt]: just do

[Nick McGowan]: yeah and what a pivotal moment i

think for the most part people that are

[Nick McGowan]: listening to this show have had one

or a couple of those moments how when

[Nick McGowan]: you get fucking pissed at yourself and

you’re done you’re like i’m done i’m done

[Nick McGowan]: living like this

[Clarissa Burt]: yeah

[Nick McGowan]: i’m done feeling this way i’m done

thinking about this

[Clarissa Burt]: now

[Nick McGowan]: fucking done

[Clarissa Burt]: yep

[Nick McGowan]: and then moving along from there

[Clarissa Burt]: i’m out

[Nick McGowan]: so from that point being able to

kind of walk toward their path to self

[Nick McGowan]: mastery what sort of advice would you

give somebody

[Clarissa Burt]: grass is and always green are on

the other side the grass is green and

[Clarissa Burt]: where you water it

[Nick McGowan]: beautiful way to put that

[Clarissa Burt]: that’s simple

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: you know we’re always looking at what’s

going on and everybody else’s back yard what’s

[Clarissa Burt]: going on like don’t make it happen

in your own back or damn it

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: just self esteem one one comparing yourself

to everybody else we talked about self esteem

[Clarissa Burt]: about social media before ninety nine point

nine percent eighty nine point nine per cent

[Clarissa Burt]: of what we’re looking at a social

media ain’t real

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: its perception it’s the it’s the air

band bead villa that was rented it’s the

[Clarissa Burt]: give and the frore that were rented

for the day i’m not saying everybody but

[Clarissa Burt]: we know who they are

[Nick McGowan]: sure

[Clarissa Burt]: right it’s the perception it’s what they

want you to believe and you know again

[Clarissa Burt]: self esteem right how much self esteem

do you have to have or lack of

[Clarissa Burt]: that lack thereof to be renting your

life for a day

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: you know to be careful

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: with that stuff yeah it’s really

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: cool i’d love to have the lamb

you know actually i want the bentley and

[Clarissa Burt]: the garage you know

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: we all would love to have lovely

things and finer things but

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: but are can you by your self

esteem on a hanger at nordstrums is that

[Clarissa Burt]: what that’s all about not saying that’s

not

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: great stuff it’s all great stuff but

you know it’s just are you coming from

[Clarissa Burt]: the right place when you’re when you’re

doing that when you’re just

[Nick McGowan]: yeah

[Clarissa Burt]: you know get the point

[Nick McGowan]: i get it totally and i can

tell you at the point where you’re like

[Nick McGowan]: if you haven’t got the unting point

but now just

[Clarissa Burt]: haven’t

[Nick McGowan]: go back and listen just start over

just hit play from the top and you’re

[Nick McGowan]: totally good

[Clarissa Burt]: gotten the point and i’ll just go

read the book

[Nick McGowan]: yeah just start over so good i

appreciate you being on i appreciate the conversation

[Clarissa Burt]: okay

[Nick McGowan]: the depth you’re so wonderful to talk

to here where can people find you and

[Nick McGowan]: where can they connect with you

[Clarissa Burt]: well we can definitely find me anywhere

except snap

[Nick McGowan]: okay

[Clarissa Burt]: that i’m just not a snap that

kind of a so

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: i don’t now how it

[Nick McGowan]: oh

[Clarissa Burt]: works but just clear sebert straight down

straight down

[Nick McGowan]: ah

[Clarissa Burt]: the pike facebook linked in instagramclu bert

[Nick McGowan]: m

[Clarissa Burt]: b r t

[Nick McGowan]: perfect and all that will be in

the show notes again it’s been a pleasure

[Nick McGowan]: thank you so much for your time

[Clarissa Burt]: so much i appreciate it