Episode summary: Dr. Eugene K. Choi achieved the American Dream. He earned his doctorate, had a 6 figure job, lived in his dream apartment, and drove a sports car, but he wasn’t happy. That left him with the question “now what?”
Needing to do something drastic, an odd and different opportunity rose. There was a Youtube channel that wanted Dr. Eugene on their team.
He spoke with his wife and she supported the decision to leave everything behind and start this new adventure. Dr. Eugene had great feelings about this move and this decision led to many other amazing great opportunities.
All it takes is saying something yes to something crazy.
Guest Name & Bio: Dr. Eugene K. Choi Pharm. D is a Certified Transformational Mindset coach that helps talented heart-driven leaders operate at their highest levels of clarity, energy, and focus.
With a background in clinical pharmacy, neuroscience, and business coaching, his unique science-backed process along with the use of groundbreaking technology helps entrepreneurs figure out how to dramatically improve performance, innovate dynamic solutions, and achieve their goals.
His articles have reached over 9 million people and he has helped hundreds of leaders significantly transform their results at both a professional and personal level.
EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION
[Nick McGowan]: Dr. Eugene welcome to the show man how you doing? [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thanks so much i’m really excited to be here [Nick McGowan]: i’m excited that you’re here i was telling you right before we hit record that [Nick McGowan]: i was saying to myself a number of weeks ago like i really want to [Nick McGowan]: be able to have more people on the show that get into the science of [Nick McGowan]: things i’ve done over fifty episodes at this point by the time yours comes out [Nick McGowan]: it will be a lot more than that but i had a lot of conversations [Nick McGowan]: that have been almost ethereal or spiritual and halistic in a sense but i want [Nick McGowan]: to be able to get to some of the science stuff because honestly dr eugene [Nick McGowan]: there are certain people i know that listen to that show that are like i’ve [Nick McGowan]: heard all that ship before but i’m a science guy so i’m excited to get [Nick McGowan]: into this sort of stuff because i know that you basically straddle both sides of [Nick McGowan]: that but you are also a doctor so i don’t want to take really any [Nick McGowan]: of your thunder here why don’t you tell us what you do for a living [Nick McGowan]: and one thing that most people don’t know about you that’s maybe a little odd [Nick McGowan]: or bizarre [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah so what i do now is it’s bazar because i’m a former pharmacist right [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’m a doctor of pharmacy and i started my own business and i work with [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a lot of leaders cos sometimes political leaders and i teach them the brains and [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: behind how to perform better how to focus better how to activate your creativity at [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: will especially because the part of your brain that you need the most is actually [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: shut off for about seventy per cent of your adult life and [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: something that most people don’t know about me is i know what it’s like to [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: be in the middle of three gun fights because i was living in one of [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the most violent cities in the world at the time for a month doing some [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: volunteer work [Nick McGowan]: wow well we have to start off with the guns [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: then um guns don’t kill people [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: people kill people [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: but what happened give us some contextto that man
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah so i was in college youknow in the asian world you know it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like the cultural expectations it it’s likebe a doctor lawyer that kind of thing
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i was in a soul searching periodand i just wanted
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to get away i had good friendof mine that did some volunteer work out
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in reoditionary in brazil um and hewas telling me about it so i said
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you know i’ll go i was apharmacy student at time and decided to volunteer
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i was part of i lived inan area cal i favella’s if you ever
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: heard of a movie called city ofgod for example it was a famous movie
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i was living like [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a block away from one of thoselocations it’s one of the most violent areas
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the world where more than sevento
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: eight percent of the kids don’t livepast twenty one years old because of the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: gun violence they get heavily involved indrug trafficking so what happens
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: is the brazilian squat team on occasionwill come in raid the avella
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: my first day of arriving there theycame
[Nick McGowan]: oh man [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: they came and [Nick McGowan]: come [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: then [Nick McGowan]: on [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: they were shooting at each other andwe were under the windows like what the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: bullets ricochet above me and then thedirector of the organization i was working was
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like welcome to barrel which was thename of the ella so yeah i
[Nick McGowan]: you’re like i’m getting the next flightout of here
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that i am not personally speaking that’swhy i’m not a fan of guns that’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: why if like friends are doing batchropartiesthey want to go to shooting
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: range i’m like all good i’ll bewith you guys but i don’t want it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah that [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: memory got ingrained in my brain [Nick McGowan]: i could only imagine [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: cheese [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s not sex [Nick McGowan]: there’s no [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: and i assume it’s not like themovies where you’re like
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: not [Nick McGowan]: oh there’s [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: at all [Nick McGowan]: guns and [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: not [Nick McGowan]: people [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: at [Nick McGowan]: are [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: all [Nick McGowan]: shooting stuff that’s got to be terrifying [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it was terrifying yeah and i didn’tknow
[Nick McGowan]: jees [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: how loud they were either like [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that was my full extent hearing howloud it was
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like right when it’s all happening [Nick McGowan]: wow and so day one [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: you’re like here i am on dayone and how did the rest of it
[Nick McGowan]: go i mean did you get into [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: anything [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the [Nick McGowan]: else [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: community [Nick McGowan]: crazy [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was [Nick McGowan]: or it was the rest of the [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: trip [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i mean the gun fights happened liketwo major times after where they got raided
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: again and again and i heard itgot rated a lot more
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: leading up to i went before twothousand sixteen so you know when the olympic
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: we announced that’s when they started cleaningup really hard
[Nick McGowan]: h [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it was beautiful dude like the communitythere the surprising because the drugtraffricers took really
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: good care of their community so it’slike it’s a bubble is its own bubble
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it had its like beauty about itand those drug traffickers were really friendly with
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me they loved me because they knewi was contributing towards their community so it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: kind of like a protective big brother [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: kind of feeling from them so myeah
[Nick McGowan]: wow [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ironically like it was it was reallybeautiful like i loved it i built a
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: lot of cool relationships over there andit’s interesting right and then you come home
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to your first world [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: country after seeing like houses [Nick McGowan]: he [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that have three walls in some ofthese places and um you
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: go back to your original friends backhome and they’re complaining about their boss or
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the complaining about new car part thatthey want to buy
[Nick McGowan]: yeah and you’re like shut up [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: huge huge culture [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: shock yeah i got pretty jaded afterthat but it
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was it was a it was notsomething i would take back i learned so
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: much from it [Nick McGowan]: that’s an interesting thing you know i’vehad a couple conversations over i’d say probably
[Nick McGowan]: the past decade or so where [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: we’ve gotten into conversation about being ableto go over seas and experiencing that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: because if you’re here even if you’rein the states or if you just live
[Nick McGowan]: in your own town i think abouthow many people are counties you know
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: we were talking about new york andphilly before we hit record and neither one
[Nick McGowan]: of us live in those places anymore
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: and haven’t for years [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yep yep [Nick McGowan]: but there are lots of people i’msure you some that come to mind even
[Nick McGowan]: for the audience there are people thatare listening to this now that you may
[Nick McGowan]: be a county if you are loveyou
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: if not [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: if you know p that ar countiesyou know
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ah [Nick McGowan]: that’s how it kind of works wheresome people just kind of get stuck but
[Nick McGowan]: going to a different country and experiencingsomething different allows
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: you to look at things relatively sowhen you i mean for you to go
[Nick McGowan]: and first they be like oh coolgun violence
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: beautiful welcome to the country i couldimagine that’s got to be kind of tough
[Nick McGowan]: coming back but when you said youwere a bit jaded was it more jaded
[Nick McGowan]: f people didn’t understand the relativism ofit or the relativity of it all
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: or [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s just like [Nick McGowan]: what [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a [Nick McGowan]: was [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: shock [Nick McGowan]: it that [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you [Nick McGowan]: kind [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: know [Nick McGowan]: of jaded [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like [Nick McGowan]: you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you come back home from like poverty [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and gun violence [Nick McGowan]: my [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to safety and right like luxury rightin a sense and it’s very jading
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it reminds me so i’ve also donework in india with mother teresa’s organization
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like i remember like being across thestreet
[Nick McGowan]: wow [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’m at a luxury mall and you’relooking out the window from like the fifth
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: floor and across the street as theslums it’s just like literally across the street
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s in new york [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: too right there’s an [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: area like between like [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: harlem [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and fifth ave like across the streetit’s like clearly like not that great looking
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so that’s kind of where it isjaded like the inequality like that kind of
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: stuff right like you know how thewhole rich get rich or kind of thing
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like it was just face to facewith it and the poor to get poor
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: at that whole ordeal but yeah imean i agree with you there’s
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: nothing like having a shift in perspectivethat is why i left new york i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: didn’t realize it was a bubble untilyou left the bubble right and then you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: start seeing [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and realizing there’s so [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: many more ways to just live lifebecause i was just not happy with it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: any more in new york i don’ti think billy is similar to you right
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s like it’s [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: normal to be busy and overworking andhustling and being
[Nick McGowan]: oh yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: being unhappy like if you’re happy peoplethink something is wrong with you
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and [Nick McGowan]: they [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i move [Nick McGowan]: hate you for it like why areyou so
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: i don’t get that and [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and [Nick McGowan]: then they bitrocamplain and move along withlife
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah yeah if you don’t complain withthem they don’t like you
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’m like no i don’t like tocomplain
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: anymore so yeah i mean that’s [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i just didn’t [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like it so i left [Nick McGowan]: it’s a solid point man i thinka lot of people miss that you know
[Nick McGowan]: like they miss the fact that theycan make that decision and they can up
[Nick McGowan]: and move because it’s such a bigscary thing like i told you that i
[Nick McGowan]: lived in portland a little bit andwhen i left philly to move to portland
[Nick McGowan]: the amount of people that told meoh i could never the what do you
[Nick McGowan]: mean yes you can i went [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: for a long week end came backand two weeks later was moving i was
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: like you can totally do whatever youwant they were just like i do not
[Nick McGowan]: know but and they rattled off thelist of excuses got
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: my job i got my family igot this i got that and i think
[Nick McGowan]: for the most part that’s kind ofa metaphor for the way people look at
[Nick McGowan]: life where they just allow those excusesto kind of stop them you know you
[Nick McGowan]: didn’t allow the excuses to stop youat all but what was the what was
[Nick McGowan]: the path to get to that pointwhere you were like i want out of
[Nick McGowan]: this bubble and i want to godo something different
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it was just becoming more and moreaware of how unhappy i was you know
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i did i did the whole whati called the asian american dream right like
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i got my degree i got mydoctor at i was practicing pharmacy i got
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a six figure salary right out ofcollege had the nice house the nice new
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: sports [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: car the brand [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: new apartment all that good stuff andsitting there going why do i still feel
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like ship why do i still havemy trust issues
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: why do i still have all thesekind of feelings that i don’t like feeling
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i thought this was it i thoughtthis was the ticket i got my first
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: pay check and i was very anticlimactic
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so it’s just coming face to facewith you
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: satisfaction because [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you can only distract yourself with pleasurefor so long right so
[Nick McGowan]: an [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it just got to a point wheni was
[Nick McGowan]: good [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: face [Nick McGowan]: point [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to face with it and i decidedto take action
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because how do yo grow when you’restaying still you just can’t um
[Nick McGowan]: you’re [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so [Nick McGowan]: just [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i [Nick McGowan]: dying [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: didn’t know [Nick McGowan]: at that point [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i just it’s kind of like astorspigerio on the wall and see what sticks
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: kind of thing so after three years [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of working i asked my wife iwas like i have this opportunity because i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was dabbling in film making at thetime and i told her i had this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: opportunity where this [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: three [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: asian dudes left behind their very successfulcareers one was a harvard med student one
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was a youngest asian director at thetime at the white house and the third
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: guy was being consulting which is oneof the biggest consulting firms out there and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: they quit to make vide i wason youtube and they invited me to join
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the team so i asked her whado you think about spending
[Nick McGowan]: we [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you forty five minutes forty five dayson the road
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and just have the trip of ourlives and then moved to l a and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: she said sure so that was myfirst kind of experience just stepping out of
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the bubble and i’ve never looked backsince because i don’t know how else to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: describe but there’s nothing else like itjust it was the most liberating i felt
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: all my stress start to melt awayum there was just something about that
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: trip that started [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: at all and that was back intwo thousand thirteen
[Nick McGowan]: hat’s awesome man and especially to havea partner that goes yeah let’s do it
[Nick McGowan]: and be able to jump into thati could imagine that would have been pretty
[Nick McGowan]: scary for you to step [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: outside of it and look i’m anamerican and for the most part my family
[Nick McGowan]: were with you know a handful ofus but it’s a big as irish family
[Nick McGowan]: and not [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: not the exact same as what iknow you’re alluding to with the asian american
[Nick McGowan]: family [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: one of my good friends grew ina similar situation and i know there’s a
[Nick McGowan]: lot of pressure that comes with thatthere’s some pressure
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: that just comes with [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: being in the north east anyway wherepeople
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ah [Nick McGowan]: expect you to [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: constantly be on the go constantly beworking through stuff and any mental issues they
[Nick McGowan]: just don’t want to talk about itthey just
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: take it and say fucking put dirton it get your ass back up and
[Nick McGowan]: get back in the game and [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you got to be tough [Nick McGowan]: got a yeah and that’s not theway to process through that stuff so as
[Nick McGowan]: you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: correct [Nick McGowan]: started to process through i want toshift out of this because i’m making money
[Nick McGowan]: i’m doing all the things but there’sstill this fucking hole in my heart what
[Nick McGowan]: was that transition like mindset wise foryou to kind of walk through that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah definitely a roller coaster it wasn’tall rainbows and unicorns because there
[Nick McGowan]: of [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was [Nick McGowan]: course [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a whole other aspect of my journeythere to get to where i’m at today
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in terms of the mind set [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: aspect i remember it was light changingfor me because like i remember i had
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this moment right [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like it might be some [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: people might call it like a spiritualmoment like i just like the best way
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i like to describe is like ifelt like something was communicating with me right
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: call it what you want god [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: universe whatever right i was on thestretch of the road trip for about nine
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: hours it was a nine hour stretchthat we’re going on to the next state
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that we’re going to and i justremember sitting there and remember something i was
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: feeling it right it’s not like iwas hearing a voice in my head but
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like i was feeling [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: something was communicating with me hey forthe first time in your life you’re giving
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me something to work with because allup to this point you are complaining
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you kept [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: treating [Nick McGowan]: man [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me like a vending machine please fixthis please to fix that and i will
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: finally take action when i have thegolden green light like you know wat i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: mean like [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you know the road is paved forhim with certainty about my future but
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s like for the first time itook a risk
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and i felt this feeling of likeyou’re giving me something to work with for
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the first time because if you keepgiving me nothing i can’t work with it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and [Nick McGowan]: it’s [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that [Nick McGowan]: beautiful [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was just the beginning of a crazyjourney that led to i did film making
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: for a little bit some of thebiggest projects that i spear headed got twenty
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: three million views on like we hadmultiple pieces of
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: work that went vira that taught mea out marketing a long story
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: short that got me at some pointhired into a business coaching company where the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: co of a multi million dollar businesstaught me all about business fast forward to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: another time when i wrote an articleon line that got seven million views and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: went vial as well that single handedlylaunched my business to help me go full
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: time into it and the next thingi know i’m coaching like seven figured business
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: owners and i coached the mayor [Nick McGowan]: awesome [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: last year it’s just like the listgoes on and on of the wild stuff
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that’s ever happened since that [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: if i told myself ten years agothis is what would happen i’m just like
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i would i would yeah i wouldthink i was full of ship
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right like so [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah that was a life changing momentfor me it’s just like this aspect of
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like you got to give call itwhat you want the world universe you gotta
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: give it something to work with [Nick McGowan]: sure [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: if you’re gonna stay still it’s notgoing
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to work [Nick McGowan]: and that’s a beautiful thing i’ve hadconversations recently about what i keep thinking about
[Nick McGowan]: is doors when you open up adoor and then there are other doors that
[Nick McGowan]: are in front of that door littledo you know if you were to look
[Nick McGowan]: you know a view a hundred footup or whatever you could see all those
[Nick McGowan]: doors [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: between all those walls but realistically youhave no idea until you either go through
[Nick McGowan]: a door or you don’t and foryou to actually go through door and say
[Nick McGowan]: all it i’m going to go throughthis one and take this jump to go
[Nick McGowan]: across country and change everything that setyou up to be able to go through
[Nick McGowan]: those other doors but it still tookyou to be faithful in that sort of
[Nick McGowan]: way keep moving through it now didyou feel things i say more more real
[Nick McGowan]: than you had in the past becausethat sounds like that was one of those
[Nick McGowan]: first kind of moments where you’re likei didn’t hear some booming voice scream at
[Nick McGowan]: me and say this [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: is the thing you need to dobut to feel it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: correct [Nick McGowan]: once you feel that and you’re awareof that it’s like a muscle you start
[Nick McGowan]: to kind of work it [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: now what did that look like foryou to be able to start to work
[Nick McGowan]: that and experience more of that justalong the path that you started on
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i mean you can only ignore thatnagging feeling for so
[Nick McGowan]: uh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: long right so [Nick McGowan]: uh yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m yeah [Nick McGowan]: agreed [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the beginning was like dip yourtoe in the water i’ll just do it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: little by little right like i’ll belike okay
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’ll move this direction and then themore and more cool stuff that would happen
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s just like maybe this the stuffis actually real like the stuff like people
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: preach in personal development world and allthat um
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and yeah one one door led toanother and that’s exactly right you know i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: remember like i think the first thingthat i was tinking abou when you’re talking
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: about doors is like most of uswhen we’re afraid we just can’t even see
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that there’s a door to begin withwe don’t even know there’s a door
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that’s the first step [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to just put your head up fora moment and just explore options and see
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that there’s in fact many doors wejust
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: literally can’t see it so yeah oncei saw the first door took it realize
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh i like what on the otherside then you kind of get
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: more curious i wonder what’s in thisnext store and then one thing just led
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to another and yeah dude i’m stillit’s still serial for me in terms of
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what’s happened in my life [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: things i thought i could i neverknew i can actually experience it’s already happened
[Nick McGowan]: that’s a common consensus for everybody everybodythat opens those doors you know we all
[Nick McGowan]: say those things and i feel sadin a certain way for the people that
[Nick McGowan]: don’t get it because they don’t stepoutside their fear to open that door but
[Nick McGowan]: like you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: had said a lot of people don’tknow as you said it i kind of
[Nick McGowan]: pictured somebody being really upset and atthat point there their hands are over their
[Nick McGowan]: eyes because there s in their theirpalms and they can’t
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: see anything because they’re just [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: correct [Nick McGowan]: so upset and it’s a matter ofthe awareness once you’re aware of the thing
[Nick McGowan]: you can go to it think aboutit if you looked around you’re like oh
[Nick McGowan]: there’s a fucking door over there thedoes that door lead me to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: i wonder what i can do somepeople will be like oh no you never
[Nick McGowan]: know it could be some big hairyscary monster behind it eople like you and
[Nick McGowan]: i are like fun boot kick thedoor and if there’s a big scary monster
[Nick McGowan]: you shut it if not because mostcase there isn’t you’re able to just kind
[Nick McGowan]: of walk through it and move throughit so you’ve gone through a ton over
[Nick McGowan]: and it’s almost been ten years sinceyou made that trip which is i’m sure
[Nick McGowan]: crazy for you to think about adecade
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: has [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: passed since that has happened [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: exactly [Nick McGowan]: so tell us about tell us aboutthat decade in you know twenty minutes here
[Nick McGowan]: um tell [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: us about that decade and like thepath that got you to where you’re at
[Nick McGowan]: now and what you’re doing now withit
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah absolutely so what i’m doing nowso this was the coolest part is i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: left behind pharmacy right and i wasi was a clinical pharmacist so i was
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the hospitals [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: doing a lot of work with doctorsnurses right like basically making sure they don’t
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: screw up right the drugs and allthat
[Nick McGowan]: you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: which [Nick McGowan]: don’t [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: would [Nick McGowan]: kill [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: be surprised [Nick McGowan]: people [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: at how many how many times peoplescrew up
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but anyway we don’t need to gothere but
[Nick McGowan]: h yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it finally came it finally came [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: full circle my health care background helpedme understand the science so i was diving
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: deep into neuro science and i hadthis big hole moment where because of the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: marketing skills i’ve indirectly developed from creatinga lot of content that went viral and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: all that right i was looking atthis and i discovered a couple of things
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: when i was loing at the brainscience where oh my goodness like there is
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: gold in here if it can becommunicated in a non academic way where it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: simple [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: for pope to understand [Nick McGowan]: a human way [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and in a human way [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and more importantly to apply because alot of academics are horrible communication right they’re
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: just [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you know throwing big [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: words at you all the time umthis can actually be life changing because like
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: for example this was the first bigaha i had was look your brain your
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: whole nervous system can only be inone of two states it’s what i call
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a survival state or an executive stateokay so the
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing to know about the executive stateis this is where all of your super
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: powers come from that’s the best wayi like to explain it your critical thinking
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: skills come from here your problem solvingskills your empathy your creativity your innovation your
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: intuition the list just goes on andon and on of all these amazing functions
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your brain has okay the survival stateis the part of your brain that can’t
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: think it’s a reactive mode you’re reactingwithout thinking because it’s meant for life threatening
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: scenario so when i was in themiddle of a gun fight i need my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: survival state to turn on [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right to hide or to run away [Nick McGowan]: ye [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to protect myself to prevent myself frombeing dead so the key thing about that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: though is a reaction without thinking you’renot thinking you’re not able to access these
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: amazing parts of your brain because yourbrain feels like it’s under threat so when
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re talking about like because of ourfear we can’t even see these doors because
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your hands are on your face whenyou’re in a survival state this is why
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you can’t see all the portunities thatare around you and the solutions that you’re
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: around [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you because you literally develop tunnel visioncase in point if a tiger walks into
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your room right now an angry tigerare you going to look
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: anywhere else except where the tiger isdo you see what i’m saying no
[Nick McGowan]: one [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so [Nick McGowan]: hundred [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you [Nick McGowan]: percent [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: can’t see anything else in the roomexcept the tiger even though there’s all this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: stuff [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the room that’s there it’s thesame applies
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: when we’re in fear were so focusedon the thing that we’re afraid of which
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: usually isn’t even real right were focus [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: on the thing we’re afraid of yourbrain literally cannot see all these other things
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that probably will help you get whatyou want to begin with you see what
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’m saying [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so here’s the crazy part like isaid earlier based on research for about seventy
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: percent of our adult life on averageere not in the executive
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: state we’re in the survival state thepart of your brain that can’t access critical
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thinking skills problem solving skills creativity notbecause your life is actually in danger it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: we’re surviving from feelings that feel uncomfortablehow do you know this is true you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: have to reflect and think how oftendo you feel angry how often do you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: feel frustrated sad anxious depressed and youany of these emotions that don’t feel good
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because guess what research shows that emotionalpain can be processed just as painful as
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: physical pain in the brain you seewhat i’m saying
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so your brain can’t help [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but view it as a threat whichis why we go into this survival mode
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that you’ve lost access to the partof your brain that you need to begin
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: with [Nick McGowan]: yeah and that it’s wild i thinkthere’s a lot of people in the world
[Nick McGowan]: that think it stuck almost like whatyou were saying earlier about the asian american
[Nick McGowan]: dream with the american dream or whateverthey’ve been kind of force fed you’re supposed
[Nick McGowan]: to have a spouse two and ahalf children the half is always weird to
[Nick McGowan]: me [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: and a cat and a dog anda white picket fence and live in suburbia
[Nick McGowan]: and make what fifty a year iskind of the average or maybe the more
[Nick McGowan]: nowadays [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: with inflation [Nick McGowan]: but [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: now it’s like eighty [Nick McGowan]: yeah exactly but yeah so everybody’s [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: m [Nick McGowan]: kind of force fed that stuff andthey think they
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: need to do these things now acoaching client recently that told me they felt
[Nick McGowan]: like they needed to get me aridi was like well why why do you
[Nick McGowan]: feel you need to get married isit because the love you have for her
[Nick McGowan]: it’s like no my parents are expectingme to do it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: and that’s vastly different than [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: what choice you should be making sobeing able to look at those things and
[Nick McGowan]: understand that you’ve got to be awareof that first huge so for you to
[Nick McGowan]: be able to talk to your clientsabout getting out of that state the reactive
[Nick McGowan]: state what’s an easy way that youcan give without you know giving us a
[Nick McGowan]: sea it’s asy you’re coaching but forthe audience to be able to kind of
[Nick McGowan]: snap themselves out of it and realize [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: what’s going on and do something aboutit
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: absolutely so the most most important thingis awareness right like how do you change
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: something [Nick McGowan]: agreed [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: unless you’re aware of it and [Nick McGowan]: preach [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: look the [Nick McGowan]: man [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: only time you [Nick McGowan]: preach [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ever feel stuck the only time youever feel
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: stuck he can say this with totalconfidence now whenever you feel stuck we use
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that word a lot the only reasonyou’re stuck is because you’re unaware of the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing that’s keeping you the real [Nick McGowan]: uh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing that’s keeping you stuck right [Nick McGowan]: uh yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: if you’re [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so [Nick McGowan]: aware you do something [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: exactly so you know it’s it’s it’svery
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: awareness is the power meaning like ifyou have a piece of brockley stuck between
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your teeth how do yo have thepower to remove that piece of brockley until
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it comes into your awareness someone hasto point it out to you or you
[Nick McGowan]: h [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: see it in the mirror [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so the first phase it’s a hundreso on time it’s awareness so the mind
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: blowing things that i’ve come to realizethat we needed to become aware of well
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: first and foremost it’s about how safeyou feel like you said think about how
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: much pressure [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: we feel on a daily basis formany reasons culture society media right you watch
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the news [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re watching stuff like school shootings unfortunatelydramatic politics um pandemic right and
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: how unsafe you feel [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: directly correlate what state go into ifyou feel unsafe you’re gonna go into a
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: survival state [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: does that make sense right so [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: we have i have to put anotherside statistic because i remember that i read
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a survey once that asked the groupof people who’s got your back it’s a
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: very simple question right [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: sixty five percent of people in theroom said nobody guess
[Nick McGowan]: dan [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what fifty five percent of those peoplethat said nobody they were married so it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a [Nick McGowan]: of [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: question you have to ask yourself howsafe do you feel in your daily life
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to just be you [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right aside from all the pressure youface from culture society right friends family and
[Nick McGowan]: h [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because if you don’t feel safe you’regoing
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re going to survival and when you’rein survival you can’t access those amazing parts
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of yourself [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so the next thing to become awareof is what a survival state actually look
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like this is key this [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: is the part blew my mind thisis the part where people realize things they
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: don’t even realize in in the wildwhat you do in the survival state it’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: three your brain only knows how todo these three things literally it’s just comes
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: down to these three things when you’rein survival it’s fight flight freeze okay in
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the wild it’s very obvious you’re goingto pick up a weapon to fight when
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you feel like your life is indanger it you’re going to try to defend
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yourself in some way by fighting [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: or you’re going to run for yourlife and flight or you’re going to play
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: dead and freeze where you know possumsare famous for doing this because their red
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like their food alive so they playdead and they don’t get eaten so here’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the thing we’re in survival seventy percentof our adult life right we
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: need to know what the fight flightfreeze actually looks like when we’re surviving from
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: our emotions [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that’s the first thing to be awareof so that’s the first thing i just
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: cover it’s just play i tell clientsall the time make it a game just
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: see how good you become at noticingthese fight flight freeze behaviors
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: whether it’s yourself or other people sowhat is fight like fight looks like some
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of the obvious ones is you knowyou get your feelings hurt and now you’re
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: getting into fight and an argument you’reyelling and screaming and we all know where
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that by the way your empathy turnsoff when your survival so you know whe
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you get into argument [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: we usually know how that ends upright people get hurt
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so that’s a obvious one to fightor physically fighting right a lot of else
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’ll call out a lot of malesright tend to
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: get into physical fights because growing upwe hear false messages like you know be
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: tough it’s not good to show emotionstop crying stop being such a girl and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because we don’t know how to processour emotions or ever were taught how we
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: literally get into physical fights at thebar when some
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: guy say something rude to your whateverright or cutting road rates right that’s another
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: example [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of fight your ego got hurt soyou have no consideration of the cars around
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you so you feel the need tocut the person back off and fight back
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so here’s the thing there’s more subtlethings of fight that most people aren’t even
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: aware of that need to be righta fight response by the way because people
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: have an [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ego about being wrong the need toprove oneself yourself or to someone else guess
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what that’s a fight hustle culture isa fight
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right o need to work hard andoverwork it’s this it’s this reaction to your
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: feeling of inadequacy or not in whereyou’re not feeling good enough there’s some sort
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of insecurity or fear inside of youfor you to even react that way to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it is that making sense and [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i have to give examples because alot of people i run into that are
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that i work with our high performersleader and they’re proud of their fight mode
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: they think they need it right soi have
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to give an example of what imean
[Nick McGowan]: like [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: by [Nick McGowan]: a badge [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this [Nick McGowan]: of honor [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s a badge of honor exactly soi had a client once had everything
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you could imagine the [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: million dollar multi million dollar business thebeautiful house his family
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: all that good stuff and he’s inthe sixties now and he’s going why am
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i still unhappy [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and i’m talking to but the fightresponse and he’s sitting there going oh my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: god i’ve pretty much been in afight mode in that reactive fight on my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: whole life i’m like okay like tellme more what
[Nick McGowan]: an [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: do you mean by that he’s likei’ve been fighting to prove to people that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’m better than my older brother andi’m like wha are you talking about he’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like well my older brother was ann f ball player and when
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i was in high school my coachtold me my football coach told me literally
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: he said [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to me like stop trying you’re nevergoing to be as good as him don’t
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: even bother so how did he fighthe felt the need to accomplish more he
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: got the money right [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the business the family and here youare at sixty years old going why am
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i still unhappy [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because you’ve been fighting your whole lifewhen you’re fighting
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re always it always leads to burnout and always leads to lack of fulfillment
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and you know what’s the most worstthing about the fight mode is the very
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing that prevents you from getting whatyou want so what do i mean by
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this i had another client he arguedwith me about how he needed he’s like
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: no sometimes you need a survival state [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right i’m like unless you’re actually aboutto you don’t need it it’s actually
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: screwing you over in some way [Nick McGowan]: uh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: he’s like no i have to tellyou he’s like
[Nick McGowan]: h [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i hit rock bottom and i hadto fight my like my second wife divorced
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me because she was cheating on methe first wife heated on me too by
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and i was still paying [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: over two thousand dollars of child supportper month and i hit rock bottom i
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: had to gather all the change fromthe from the room to go to that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: market that still take some of yourmoney when you cash it in
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and like [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: five dollars left and i was sopissed off i remember that day and that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: was the moment i said i hadto fight and i had to keep my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: head down put my shoulder up andi was dashing through brick wall
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: after brick wall and that’s how igot to where i’m at today because he’s
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: like ink five thousand now fast likemulti millin business right
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so i’m like okay that’s fair wellwithout telling talking to you about what you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: should have would have could have donewhat about a thought exercise what if you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: understood how to activate your executive stateit’s the thing that gives you the ability
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: even if it’s just for a momentyou put your head up and your shoulder
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: down [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: maybe you actually see all those brickwalls you felt cornered into having to bash
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: through that it was your only optionwhat if those brick walls were only three
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: feet wide meaning [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: there’s a lot of other [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: options you don’t have to bash throughthose brick walls and if you’re in the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: fight mode you tend to work hardernot
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: smarter you see what i’m saying butwhen you’re in your executive
[Nick McGowan]: yep [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: state it’s what gives your brain theability to work smarter not harder if that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: makes sense and wealthy [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: people wealthy and happy people understand thisright learn how to work smarter not harder
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so anyway [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that’s a big fight one that’s athat’s the one i dive into a little
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: bit deeper because it tends to bethe one where people like pride themsels on
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a lot and are not even aware [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of that they’re in a fight modebecause they feel they need to perfect be
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a perfectionist or improve themselves to peopleet cetera and they think it’s a healthy
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing it’s not [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so they overwork as well right [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: flight pons obvious one is things likeprocrastination it’s a self soothing mechanism right because
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re there’s usually some fear there whatif i do this
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: now and i screw up what ifi do this now what will people think
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what if i do this now andi’m not ready so tend to procrastinate as
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a soothing response that’s an obvious oneof flight the more
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: subtle ones are the ones where westart to numb ourselves on purpose right some
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: people [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: over indulge things like alcohol sex drugsto the point addiction right bing watch net
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: flix eat a tub of ice cream [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: which by the way here’s no judgmentaround any of the because we all have
[Nick McGowan]: what [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: our numbing mechanism is okay so [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s just to be aware of itit’s a flight mechanism that we do to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: avoid the emotion we don’t want tofeel fleeing to work is a flight to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: fight away some people [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: distract themselves by keeping busy with work [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so that’s a flight mechanism and lastlyfreezes when we in action we don’t make
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: decisions the obvious ones is like morecomedic like you know if someone gets caught
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in a lie you see their eyeswide enough and they literally freeze
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s their brain going hey if youpretend not to exist right now maybe this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: person [Nick McGowan]: you’re [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: will stop [Nick McGowan]: done [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: interrogating [Nick McGowan]: fucked up [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you maybe this person will stop interrogatingyou if you just stay still right and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: pretend [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re dead which [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: which it’s funny because [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it just shows you’re guilty then rightif you freeze
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but anyway [Nick McGowan]: uh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: but the other ones is [Nick McGowan]: h [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: when you’re overwhelmed right it tends tocause in decision you wake up in the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: morning you feel overwhelmed you don’t wantto get out of bed and then you
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: don’t get the things done that youwant to get
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so anyway that’s the first thing it’sjust i tell clients to just make it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a game look at how often we’re [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in fight flight freeze and can yousee how why we’re actually in the survival
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: state for seventy percent of our adultlives it’s just becoming more and
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: more aware of what this actually lookslike
[Nick McGowan]: awareness man i mean the alphabet startswith a and everything else
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: needs to start with a with awarenessit
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: exactly [Nick McGowan]: all boils down to that awareness andit’s interesting
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: hundred percent [Nick McGowan]: ease you bring up a lot ofthe stories that people tell themselves like your
[Nick McGowan]: client that was like no funk youi needed to do this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: because he was defending [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yah [Nick McGowan]: the story that he had created [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: h [Nick McGowan]: for himself and put himself [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: my [Nick McGowan]: as that main character [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: saying this is my story this iswhat i am that’s just like when people
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: oh [Nick McGowan]: are about to leave their business ora job or relationship or whatever and they
[Nick McGowan]: go i don’t know what i wouldbe like if i don’t have these things
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right [Nick McGowan]: and they need to separate themselves fromthat so you’ve talked about the awareness we’ve
[Nick McGowan]: kind of covered the story of thathow do you help people separate from kind
[Nick McGowan]: of that bull ship and to beable to step outside of it and look
[Nick McGowan]: and see what’s actually happened to thendo something about it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: hundred percent so there’s two key ingredientsi realize if you truly want to transform
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your life and i mean [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that like i’m not trying to sayit as like a sales pitch like kind
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of thing right a motivational [Nick McGowan]: buzz word [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: speaking [Nick McGowan]: stuff [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: kind of thing right [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: if you [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: truly want to i realize there’s twocor ingredients the first thing is willingness and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: here’s what i mean by this [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: okay i’m goin to share it inthe form of a story because this is
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this was a life changing moment forme to about what willingness really means and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: willing ness i got to get brieflycoached by this amazing coacher names round britain
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’ll [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: just give you the one minute contextof her life at fourteen years old her
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: parents were in the idle of splittingup it was father’s day they were going
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: out for bunch her and her momgo out in the yard dad’s pulling up
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to the curb um he gets outof his car while the sisters are still
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the house getting ready he saysi need to get me hot from the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: trunk he opens the trunk doesn’t gethis coat pulls out a shot gun walking
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: over to mom pissed off at momsaying it’s our fault you did this and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: proceeds to shoot her then he pointsthe gun at ronda
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and before he pulls the trigger momwas still alive so she’s screaming at the
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: top of her lungs not to doit he didn’t know she was alive so
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: he points the gun back at momshoots her a second time looks over at
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ronda points the gun at himself andpulls the trigger fourteen years old she was
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the sole witness of a murder suicideokay
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so you can imagine a trauma likethis causes major
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: survival how does she fight she kepttheir grades up she tried perform thinking maybe
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this pain will go away if ikeep fighting how does she flee alcohol she
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: became an alcoholic and she attempted suicidethree times suicide is one of the most
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: ultimate forms of flight isn’t it [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and how did she freeze plenty ofdays she woke up in the morning didn’t
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: want to get out of bed yetone day she turned her life around this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: amazing life coach she had her ownmy award winning television show in the nineties
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: she’s been on opera not once buttwice and she turned her life around and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you see i have to share herstory because this is why her words had
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so much impact on me she saidthis until
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re willing to be wrong about everythingyou know nothing ever changes and i’m not
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: highlighting that everything you know is wrongi’m highlighting the word willing are you willing
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to be wrong [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: about what you think is true becauseshe was willing to be wrong about life
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: sucks that she is alone that badthings always happen to her because you can
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: attach those meanings to a crazy experiencelike that a drama like that can’t you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and because [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: she was willing to be wrong sheturned her life around and once you’re willing
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: second part of the ingredient is ownershipokay and what i mean by ownership is
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this yeah i used to say thisphrase to my kids like i would say
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to my daughter for example you’re makingme so mad right now when she’s not
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: listening to me right and the morei study the brain and all that i’m
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: sitting here and reflecting but i’m likeman what might a little kid interpret those
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: words as number one [Nick McGowan]: wow [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: daddy is saying she’s making daddy madso oh there must be such a thing
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: as me being the cause of youremotions she thinks that’s
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: true because that’s what i’m telling herand number two who dad s really mad
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right now it’s very scary so whendaddy’s mad it feels like he doesn’t love
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me so therefore i deve but fearof making people mad quote which can never
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: make any one any emotion by theway and i’m about to prove it to
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you so i’m sitting here going ohmy god how might this impact or as
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: an adult what happens if she hasthe unethical boss that overworks her and treats
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: her poorly because she’s afraid of makingthe boss mad she believes she can make
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: people mad she allows her boundaries toget crossed and she gives in and she
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: overworks and sacrifices her mental health and [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: probably her physical health too you knowwhat really got me i’m like ship what
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: happens if she’s in a relationship oneday may be with some boy he’s
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: pressuring her to sleep with him becauseshe’s afraid of making him mad she’ll do
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it even though she doesn’t want toso that’s when i was just like to
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the best of my ability [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because that really got me at thetime she was like the or four years
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: old i was just like baby girlyou can never make anyone mad
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the only reason that every mad [Nick McGowan]: wow [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: is because of his stuff it’s becausehe’s afraid of something and i realized my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: fear was being perceived as a baddad because you know my dad left behind
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: our family when i was a tearheld a lot of resentment and all that
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right but anyway [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to the best of my and iswitch the words from your making me mad
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to simply i’m feeling mad because iknow she’s not causing me mad the anger
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s the meaning i’m giving the experienceright oh she’s not listening
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to me so therefore that means i’ma bad dad and i used to say
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: very angry thoughts like if i’m everdad i’m not going to be a da
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: bad dad like mine so that triggered [Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me so that’s when i look atthe co and i share that story with
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: him i’m like tell me again youwere saying in this call that your team
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: is pissing you off is it yourteam that’s ising you off or is
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: something going on inside of you andthat’s ownership when they’re able to go teams
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: not kissing me off it’s me [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because the moment you do that nowyou have power you can do something about
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it and that’s the first step andthe rest is training just like you can
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: build a muscle at the gym andphysically train guess
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what there’s a whole process you cantrain your brain to better at this because
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the problem the bigger problem is ninetyto ninety five person of your brain by
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the time you’re thirty five subconscious whatdoes that mean it’s an auto pilot right
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so just like you’re not going downthe stairs going i need to put my
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: left foot forward my right foot forwardmy left foot
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you do it without thinking the sameapplies to whatever you think is real i’m
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: not good enough the negative thoughts youcarry all these living beliefs that you’re carrying
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: it’s on auto pilot in the brainso the good news is there’s nothing wrong
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: with you it’s just because [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of your unique life experiences and themeanings you’ve attached to those experiences it created
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: programming in your brain to eventually runon autopilot which is why you have this
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thing called reality but guess what reyou willing to be wrong about what you
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: think is [Nick McGowan]: um [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: real because your brain is so [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: easily fooled into what it thinks it’sreal you know
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: how i know this think about thisyou ever been in a dream when you’re
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: in the dream you tought it wasreal yeah
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so who’s to say [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this belief you might be carrying ican’t do it i’m not good enough i’m
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right like nothing everywhere if that wasn’treal are you willing to challenge that
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and then once you [Nick McGowan]: the [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: do that [Nick McGowan]: willingness [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you are one [Nick McGowan]: is a big thing [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: correct and once you [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: have that then you then it’s askill as anyone can learn it that’s what
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i’ve left behind my career to teachpeople is to just teach it to people
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and then you re wire [Nick McGowan]: that’s [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: parts [Nick McGowan]: a [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: of your brain that aren’t serving anymore [Nick McGowan]: that’s a beautiful thing man that willingnessum just saying i’m willing just think about
[Nick McGowan]: any relationship you’ve had for the audiencefor yourself like i’m willing to have this
[Nick McGowan]: conversation willing to step into this rolei’m willing to do these things if you’re
[Nick McGowan]: not willing then none of the opportunitiesare going to open up you’re
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: correct [Nick McGowan]: just unwilling to do it that’s hugeand you brought up thinking that you’re not
[Nick McGowan]: enough or that you’re crazy and andthe amount of time is growing up that
[Nick McGowan]: i thought i was fucking crazy becausei just didn’t understand how to communicate within
[Nick McGowan]: my own head and feel and understandwhat the feelings were and that goes for
[Nick McGowan]: a lot of people i’ve had somany conversations over the years where people go
[Nick McGowan]: my fucking crazy and i losing mymind and my nuts no you’re not you
[Nick McGowan]: just need to process through this stuffand work through it
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yep [Nick McGowan]: and a lot of it goes backto that awareness i think
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: hundred [Nick McGowan]: the willingness [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: per cent [Nick McGowan]: is a big thing man i appreciateyou getting into that and given some real
[Nick McGowan]: activities that people can dive into andfigure out so for the people that are
[Nick McGowan]: on their path towards self mastery whatsort of advice would you give them
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah the bottom line advice i giveis being awareness to the relationship you have
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: with yourself right i remember when thisleader was asked you know the cliche question
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: how do i find the perfect onehow do i find the perfect partner in
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: my life which by the way isa survival state question because you’re asking
[Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that question if there’s this one personin the world that you can dump a
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: hundred [Nick McGowan]: it’s not [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: percent responsibility to for [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your happiness right who would want thatpressure
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: number one it doesn’t exist [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right and the [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: people who believe that they can bethat person they have their own survival issues
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right people who play savior right becausethey have their
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: own security is about [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: worthy and all that [Nick McGowan]: yep [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so anyway the leader understood and thatthis was coming from place of survival and
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: he just asked a really powerful questionwhich was would you go out with yourself
[Nick McGowan]: m [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: and remember that hit me like aton of bricks because number one i became
[Nick McGowan]: okay [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: aware of my first answer being nobecause it’s easy to see all the
[Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: things you don’t like about yourself rightand
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you hear that in personal development [Nick McGowan]: ah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: the second thing i had a deeperbreak there was oh shit if i can
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: do all these nice things for mywife claiming it because i love her but
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: if i don’t love [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: me guess what i’m not doing thosethings for her i’m doing it for me
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because if i carry [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a belief that i’m not worthy mybrain in the fight mode will go do
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: these nice things for other people sothat one day may be you will finally
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: feel worthy making sense so far [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right so [Nick McGowan]: hm [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: that was the big break through ihad is how is your relationship with yourself
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: because if it’s not you’re going tobe in survival this is when i realized
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: i was one of those people thatoverworked over gave because i had low self
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: esteem i thought maybe if i keepover giving one day i will feel better
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: about myself but that’s the key thingto understand you cannot create authentic connection with
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: other people unless you have authentic connectionwith yourself that’s what self mastery
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: is do you accept you the wayyou are do you love yourself the way
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you are no matter what because ifyou don’t you’re going a live in survival
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you’re going to live a transactional lifeyou’re not going to have deep connections in
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: your world you’re going to be veryisolated and alone because who is the folk
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: so when you’re survival yourself you’re notbeing empathetic
[Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: when the tiger is in front ofyou about to eat you right your brains
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: not [Nick McGowan]: fuck now [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: going i wonder how this tiger isdoing today or is parents feeding
[Nick McGowan]: are you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you [Nick McGowan]: okay [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: literally [Nick McGowan]: tiger [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: are incapable of connecting [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: with other people so the most [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: important to connect with first is yourself [Nick McGowan]: and what a beautiful [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: get yourself [Nick McGowan]: way [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: what you need support love [Nick McGowan]: yeah [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: right space [Nick McGowan]: what a beautiful way to be ableto end this episode that’s such a powerful
[Nick McGowan]: thing you know we’ve gone through alot with this and druga i appreciate your
[Nick McGowan]: being on man i’m excited this isthis is our first conversation but this will
[Nick McGowan]: not be our last conversation [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah [Nick McGowan]: um tell us where can where canthe audience find you and where can they
[Nick McGowan]: connect with you [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: yeah absolutely i have a home pageit’s destiny hacks dot c o there’s a
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: free training you can sign up forthat gives you some like short term tools
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: to get out of survival when youbecome more aware of it i also have
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: a course releasing [Nick McGowan]: oh [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: its nor hacking course dot com thatbasically just brings you through what i bring
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: clients through to help you develop theseskills of requiring your brain out of survival
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: um and what i’m putting in thereas a bonus you know i’ve worked with
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: multiple like seven figured business owners gottrained by all that kind of stuff is
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: this question of how do you takeyour talent and make an impact and ideally
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: you know make some money out of it too so I’m doing a free like [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: business training in there like as wellthe bonus for there and that’s that’s released
[Dr. Eugene K Choi]: on neurohacking course dot com [Nick McGowan]: that’s awesome again thank you so muchfor being on the show we appreciate your
[Nick McGowan]: time [Dr. Eugene K Choi]: thank you so much for having me this is fun